My speech to my bestfriend at his funeral.

Welcome back to my blog, I've been debating on posting this but I think I should. This is what wrote to read at Aarons Funeral. Not edited, just something to read from and to follow so that I wasn't a mess. 

Nothing is edited it's all from my heart and I feel it should be for everyone to hear not just this who attended. Thank you for reading ❤️

Well, the time is here. The time that I've never thought about. The time that none of you have thought about. So as I'm writing this I just ask myself what do I say? What could I possibly say to ease the pain of my own and all of you. Honestly there's nothing that could be said or done to make this process any better, only easier to deal with. Distractions, talking to people, reminiscing. That's what helps us out. I hope that all of you do that during this time and I hope today is a celebration of life. Of Aarons life and also of your life. I want everybody here to leave feeling the way Aaron would want you to feel on any day. Have you laughed today? Have you relaxed today? What's something new that you've done today? And what difference have you made for the world or for the people around you?  While those questions will be hard to do today and the few days to come I ask that you try. Try to make the days count like he would, in honor of him. When you leave here I hope you have helped someone in need,or have talked to someone you've been meaning to talk to, forgive someone who has done wrong to you, help your fellow brother out and lift them up and make sure they're being the most successful they can be.  make that a goal please. In any troubled situation, in anytime he just wanted to talk or anytime he needed advice  I was always the one Aaron called, whether it be a "don't tell mom", a " girl problem" a friend situation. When he was excited he'd call me or come home and say Leila guess what... and wouldn't even let me guess because he'd be so excited to tell me. Basically everything that a bestfriend would do he would do. And today I hope that whoever you are from whatever back ground you come from, to whatever you have done in your life, I hope that you talk to someone. I hope you tell someone all of your hopes and dreams, tell someone your problems. But also, be that listening ear for someone else. It is so beautiful to hear someone's hopes and dreams and when you hear it so much and care so deeply for someone soon enough they become your own. Aarons hopes and dreams were mine too. I wanted all of his goals met, whatever it took no matter what situation he was in or what he's done. I knew that his dreams were coming true and no one could stop him. when we were kids my goal was to beat his butt . Now if you're the youngest girl with older brothers you know what I'm talking about. I mean this boy would watch wwe when he was younger and instead of waiting to do the moves on someone else he did them on me! But of course him and the neighbor boys would be doing this too but I know first hand it didn't stop at their house! And food,come on now I would get food and he would always eat my leftovers but he would get so mad if I ate his, but like the best sister I am I just let it go , I didn't want no wwe nights anymore for eating some hot braised chicken that was his from a day ago! In the mornings I remember having a different alarm clock then most people did, it was called the "waking up at 8 am from rock or rap music" alarm clock. That was fun. I remember sharing a bedroom with him and finding his notes he passed in grade school, he thought he could hide them💁🏻 I also remember him gettin his own room and never wanting anyone inside but except for his friends which was totally not fair because they didn't have to wake up to that alarm clock every morning!haha but Aaron. Was kind. He would do anything for everyone of course but there was just something about his smile that could make anyone melt. No matter if you were having a bad day or something tragic had happened you can find comfort in that smile. Not many people have smiles like that but when you see one like his remember it, cherish it. Take a look at his pictures and think of all the ways he's made you smile just by that one. Aaron was my bestfriend and still is. I knows he's with me everyday and I know he's looking down on me and saying " I'm proud of you baby girl,I love you" I miss his hugs ,his excitement like when he got to Kentucky and bought a new pair of sheets that he loved. I just cherish that FaceTime call he made to me because he was so excited and wanted to show them off .

I know for some of you, you're in a struggling situation right now. And there's two sides to this. You're either okay with it or you're not.if you're not and you have an addiction problem or need help in someway or another and have nowhere to go to please,come see me or my family. We have an amazing place for you. We have sources and we will help you, love on you and pray for you. If you are addicted,selling or whatever it could be please stop. Now I know you won't just stop the addiction and yes,that's partially what I'm talking about . But stop life for a minute and look around you. Picture this as your family. Picture yourself in a casket. What are the reasons you're doing this? Is this still cool to you? Could you look me in the face and tell me right now that this is okay? Tell me you're okay by selling horrible drugs and substances to people knowing it's not okay. If you think that's okay then when I'm done with this speech and today then you can come and tell me. Tell me because you shouldn't be afraid of it if you're that proud. Are you afraid to tell someone? Because usually when someone has done something good they're willing to tell people and let people in. That's not how it works though . In the streets now you have people hiding because no one is man enough to say what they're doing in life. You're playing Russian roulette with your life and its full of shames so why? Why not stop life and take a step back and put yourself in this spot the spot that my family is in.